Initiative

 Alright. Here I am. Journaling.

It's just..

  1. I shall practice writing.
  2. I have completely lost all goals for life, so
  3. I do not know what to do with my time and what to pursuit.
Call it whatever crisis.

After some thinking, I realized that there are actually multiple feasible directions I could have taken. But I do not feel passionate about any of them.
Digging deeper, it's my worry for missing out other potential paths that holds me back. 

Thinking about it, it's quite irrational - if I try and fail, at least I tried something; if I don't do anything and time just passes, I would miss all paths in front of me now.
However, ration alone could not push me forward.

Oh one more thing...
Instead of hesitating and doing nothing, I could have set a time, say a year, or a few months, and dedicate myself to one single goal. After that time I can decide whether to stop and change, or continue because it's the thing for me.
I couldn't even start doing that now, because... I don't know how to make my first step. 

Hence this second life thing.

Here is how it will work.
  • For the next month (let's say from tomorrow until 31st May), I'll be journaling daily. Here.
    • I promise to find time to do it, just for me!
  • Meanwhile, I'll try to read somethings... to explore the world
    • news?
    • financial times?
    • topics related to my passions?
  • What I will be writing will be
    • a quick summary for what I read that day, along with my thoughts and feelings about it
    • any significant events happen on the day, and my reflections
  • After this month, or even in the middle of it, hopefully I will have found the thing and start doing it.
For future reference, these is the list of directions that I may be interested
  • Pass BHS Level 1 and Level 2 ride/care
  • Have nice shape of body - strength training!
  • Bouldering
  • Hiking, maybe advance ton mountaineering!?
  • Ski
  • Changing team...
  • Understand UK tax then make up a great financial plan
  • Pass dressage Introductory or even Preliminary test
  • Relocate to Switzerland
  • Cycle to Brighton (and back!?)
  • Run half marathon (21K)
To note something good here! Just writing this list down I feel excited already. With some further exploration, I believe I'll find passion and goals for life again!

留言

張貼留言

這個網誌中的熱門文章

6 May

 I don't want my second life coming to an end so quickly. Boundaries need to be kept. I can do it. I know I can. Of course I can. They can ask, I can say no. And I don't have to feel bad about saying no.
閱讀完整內容

29 Apr

 I chatted to people. Many but I don't feel drained. Good sign. Ella / Boundary Boundary is good and important. Distant could help. We'll figure out more from here. Ella / Changing Team Turns out it's easy. Just go on grow and see if there's any open headcount. Chat with the hiring manager, and that's it. No excellent ratings required (up to the hiring manager, though). There's also a "transfer with level change". Apparently it only applies to L6-9, so for me, no hope for one stone two birds :p Change team is referred as "project transfer", no interview required (yay!) It says gResume in docs. But Ella didn't mention it at all. I suppose it's for role transfer specifically. But! If I transfer now, I won't be able to relocate to Zurich within a year. I should take this into consideration.  Ella / Project I feel my brain is function again! But I'm still feeling a bit anxious and stressed while information flooded me. I'm bac...
閱讀完整內容